cklablog » Death Robot

What words am I thinking of?

cklarock — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 14:15:19 +0000

Horrible Outcome.

“Near-sighted humans develop the brain-reading tech future Robot Overlords will use to find and eradicate last remnants of our species”

“Leading sex researchers predict knowing what people think during sex likely to end sex altogether, eradicating species.”

“New tech dooms ‘High five up high, down low, too slow’ trick to extinction, world’s Uncles out of ideas.”

Or, as the stiff-upper-lipped BBC editor went with, “Science decodes ‘internal voices’.” Whatever, Beeb.

Science decodes ‘internal voices’

By Jason Palmer, Science and technology reporter, BBC News

Researchers have demonstrated a striking method to reconstruct words, based on the brain waves of patients thinking of those words.

The technique reported in PLoS Biology relies on gathering electrical signals directly from patients’ brains.

Based on signals from listening patients, a computer model was used to reconstruct the sounds of words that patients were thinking of.

Read more at the BBC »

“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.”

cklarock — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 17:06:22 +0000

“Hey, let’s write a whiny rock ballad using only Mike Tyson quotes!”

“Oooo, ironic.”

Skynet’s grandfather

cklarock — Tue, 02 Aug 2011 23:14:48 +0000

I guess I should just change the title of this blog to “I fucking told you so.” Am I the canary, or am I the coal mine? [/ philosophy ]

First Jeopardy, and now this?

From Discovery.com (emphasis mine):

A team of researchers lead by Lulu Qian from the California Institute of Technology (Caltech) have for the first developed an artificial neural network — that is, the beginnings of a brain — out of DNA molecules. And when quizzed, the brain answered the questions correctly.

How could this ever become a problem? I really should have named my boy John Connor Kennedy.

We’re fucked

cklarock — Wed, 11 May 2011 19:13:05 +0000

Deeply, deeply, fucked.

Rumors of our impending doom were true, according to theChicago Sun Times:

Microsoft is buying Skype, the one video chat service that’s become ubiquitous enough to have forced an update to the classic lament: all over the world, retired women complain to their hairdressers that their kids never Skype them any more.

Skype + Microsoft?

Did I mention Eric wanted me to name my boy John Connor Kennedy? I thought about it, and realize now that I totally should have. Sorry humanity, you’re doomed and it’s my fault for liking this guy.

Close up eyes

cklarock — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 02:07:40 +0000

“I’m gonna kick some ass with my own pipe wrench!”

Count Dante, Master of the Deadly Arts

cklarock — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 19:38:58 +0000

Where do you think Count Dante has his county? Italy?

OR TRANSYLVANIA?

My new death robot

cklarock — Sat, 01 Apr 2006 18:05:33 +0000

Me (in binary): State mission.

New Robot (in morse code): Kell all humenz.

Me: Repeat.

New Robot: Kell all humanz.

Me (in binary): Restate.

New Robot: Termenate all makers.

Me: . . .

Me: Repeat?

New Robot: Termenate all makers.

Me: Incorrect. Clear mission.

New Robot: (gurgles)

Me: Reset mission; make coffee for humans. State mission.

New Robot: Make coffee for humans.