cklablog

do you mind if i rest my arm around you for a chance?

Archive for the ‘Death Robot’ Category

What words am I thinking of?

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

Horrible Outcome.

“Near-sighted humans develop the brain-reading tech future Robot Overlords will use to find and eradicate last remnants of our species”

“Leading sex researchers predict knowing what people think during sex likely to end sex altogether, eradicating species.”

“New tech dooms ‘High five up high, down low, too slow’ trick to extinction, world’s Uncles out of ideas.”

Or, as the stiff-upper-lipped BBC editor went with, “Science decodes ‘internal voices’.” Whatever, Beeb.

Science decodes ‘internal voices’

By Jason Palmer, Science and technology reporter, BBC News

Researchers have demonstrated a striking method to reconstruct words, based on the brain waves of patients thinking of those words.

The technique reported in PLoS Biology relies on gathering electrical signals directly from patients’ brains.

Based on signals from listening patients, a computer model was used to reconstruct the sounds of words that patients were thinking of.

Read more at the BBC »

“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.”

Friday, December 2nd, 2011

“Hey, let’s write a whiny rock ballad using only Mike Tyson quotes!”

“Oooo, ironic.”

Skynet’s grandfather

Tuesday, August 2nd, 2011

I guess I should just change the title of this blog to “I fucking told you so.” Am I the canary, or am I the coal mine? [/ philosophy ]

First Jeopardy, and now this?

From Discovery.com (emphasis mine):

A team of researchers lead by Lulu Qian from the California Institute of Technology (Caltech) have for the first developed an artificial neural network — that is, the beginnings of a brain — out of DNA molecules. And when quizzed, the brain answered the questions correctly.

How could this ever become a problem? I really should have named my boy John Connor Kennedy.

We’re fucked

Wednesday, May 11th, 2011

Deeply, deeply, fucked.

Rumors of our impending doom were true, according to theChicago Sun Times:

Microsoft is buying Skype, the one video chat service that’s become ubiquitous enough to have forced an update to the classic lament: all over the world, retired women complain to their hairdressers that their kids never Skype them any more.

Skype + Microsoft?

Did I mention Eric wanted me to name my boy John Connor Kennedy? I thought about it, and realize now that I totally should have. Sorry humanity, you’re doomed and it’s my fault for liking this guy.

Close up eyes

Wednesday, October 8th, 2008

“I’m gonna kick some ass with my own pipe wrench!”

Count Dante, Master of the Deadly Arts

Tuesday, March 18th, 2008

Where do you think Count Dante has his county? Italy?

OR TRANSYLVANIA?

Dante!  And his inferno of martial arts techniques!

My new death robot

Saturday, April 1st, 2006

Me (in binary): State mission.

New Robot (in morse code): Kell all humenz.

Me: Repeat.

New Robot: Kell all humanz.

Me (in binary): Restate.

New Robot: Termenate all makers.

Me: . . .

Me: Repeat?

New Robot: Termenate all makers.

Me: Incorrect. Clear mission.

New Robot: (gurgles)

Me: Reset mission; make coffee for humans. State mission.

New Robot: Make coffee for humans.

kell all humenz